Love Yourself Lovely - love yourself lean: Day #34

Theme

Oops

Description

Forgiveness

To Do

Forgive ... and forgive again

Nourish Yourself

“Forgiveness can be a challenge for several reasons. Sometimes forgiveness can be confused with condoning what someone has done to us: “That’s OK. Why not do it again?” Forgiveness can be difficult when the person who wronged us doesn’t seem to deserve our forgiveness -- it’s hard to remember that forgiveness benefits the forgiver more than the one who is forgiven. Ultimately, forgiveness is especially challenging because it’s hard to let go of what’s happened. However, it’s important to let go and forgive. Here are some reasons why:

Forgiveness is good for your heart -- literally. One study from the Journal of Behavioral Medicine found forgiveness to be associated with lower heart rate and blood pressure as well as stress relief. This can bring long-term health benefits for your heart and overall health.
A later study found forgiveness to be positively associated with five measures of health: physical symptoms, medications used, sleep quality, fatigue, and somatic complaints. It seems that the reduction in negative affect (depressive symptoms), strengthened spirituality, conflict management and stress relief one finds through forgiveness all have a significant impact on overall health.
A third study, published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, found that forgiveness not only restores positive thoughts, feelings and behaviors toward the offending party (in other words, forgiveness restores the relationship to its previous positive state), but the benefits of forgiveness spill over to positive behaviors toward others outside of the relationship. Forgiveness is associated with more volunteerism, donating to charity, and other altruistic behaviors. (And the converse is true of non-forgiveness.)” (http://stress.about.com/od/relationships/a/forgiveness.htm)

“Researchers now believe that letting go of grudges may fortify the heart and the immune system. "When you're stuck in a grudge, you're isolated in your own suffering," says Fred Luskin, Ph.D., author of Forgive for Good and director of the Stanford Forgiveness Project. "The long-term damage to the cardiovascular system from bitterness and resentment is clearly established." (http://www.lhj.com/health/stress/relaxation-techniques/the-benefits-of-forgiveness/)

Get Up & Go!

Do an exercise that will yield lasting results. Go forgive someone. Don’t think twice about it. Whoever comes to mind first, or most... this is the one to contact. It will be good for your heart..... then enjoy a great freeing workout... chances are you’ll feel lights as a feather

Tools

Love, self-respect

Tip

Steps to Forgiveness: http://www.happiness-information.com/steps-to-forgiveness.html

Tweak

Ask for forgiveness.... by apologizing

Question

Do you remember the last time you forgave someone? How did it make you feel?

Thought

“Forgiveness is not an occasional thing> It is a permanent attitude” - Martin Luther King

“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.” - Robert Muller

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” - Lewis B. Smedes

"To err is human; to forgive, divine." - Alexander Pope

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.” - Mark Twain

“Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.” - Oscar Wilde

Tidbit

“In a study conducted by Dr. Frederick Luskin, a Senior Advisor in Health Promotion at Standford University, and Director of The Stanford Forgiveness Projects, he showed that financial advisors who were given training in interpersonal forgiveness as a healthy response to the normal difficulties of business produced an average increase in sales between 18 - 46% over an reference group of advisors who produced average increases of only 5 - 14%. He also showed that their (the financial advisors who received training) level of productivity increased by 24% as well as their ability to experience positive emotional states like happiness, better focus, better night's sleep. They also showed a 23% decrease in physical symptoms of stress.” (http://www.forgivenessasanactofpower.com/members/faaaop/blog/VIEW/00000001/00000001/Forgiveness-Research.html#00000001)
“Forgiveness may be beneficial not just for AIDS patients, but for everyone, says Dr. Luskin. After giving 260 volunteers nine hours of training in forgiveness, he found that forgiveness lowered their stress, boosted their feelings of self-confidence and helped them feel a greater sense of community with other people. His subjects also reported fewer headaches, backaches and upset stomachs.” (http://www.lhj.com/health/stress/relaxation-techniques/the-benefits-of-forgiveness/)
(NPR) Studies Suggest Forgiveness Has Health Benefits: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=17785209